Seems I've been dwelling on the past a lot lately, big problem of mine, I always seem to be worrying about the future or dreaming of days gone by. Never seem to spend enough time in the present. Perhaps its a natural part of growing up, but I seem to be going the wrong way. Life gets increasingly more complex. I get wrapped up in the day to day concerns of work, bills, family, and all the other problems which accumulate as you grow up. I miss who I was, I am perhaps wiser now, more educated and experienced than I once was. But I think I've lost or given up important things to get there. I don't feel as creative, I'm tired all the time, and I very rarely find the magic I once could touch so often. Life was a wild thing, full of mystery and excitement, now its just an attempt to get through the day.
Not that things are bad, I have my problems to be sure, but overall I have good friends, a good family, and a good job. Not thrilled with where I'm living, but that hopefully won't be permanent. I just hope this isn't all there is too life. I hope that I can find that person I once was that could find the magic everyday. I know he is in there somewhere, I can feel him yearning to get out when I watch a storm move in, I feel him tickling my scalp when certain music plays, and I feel him stirring when I read of heroes.